Those Brownies

Bongu tfal.

!!SURGERY IS OVER!! *seizure time*

Quite happy with the paper, I think I passed XD Went round to room 101 and spent a good couple of hours chilling on the bean bags with the usual crowd. Good times, good times :)

Tonight I start the grande crusade of pharmacology. The exam's on monday, I don't know what exactly the paper format is, what notes I have or don't have, or really what they contain. Fun, fun. I'm quite relaxed about it though, will be fine I'm sure. So I'll be in almost all weekend, will probably go out for the pentecost thing tomorrow night unless I find I've really underestimated this exam.... naaaaaaahhh.... XD

As I was walking up the stairs when I arrived home today the light was a little dull, a sense of twilight if you will (don't go there :P), and everything was quiet. Just the sound of the tv in the background. It had that calming sense of stillness that i always associate with the gray light of dusk or dawn. It was just a moment, but a beautiful one. And now I've got this prolonged mood on me that I think will last all night. I hope so in any case, it's a wonderful feeling. It also crossed my mind about how happy I am in that my studies don't mean the world to me. For some people their course and their work is everything, their world, their life. If they had to fail it's like their world would end. I don't particularly want to fail, but even if I had to, life would move on. I still have the most wonderful friends ever, am part of a community that, despite all its faults and drama, I love, a great family, and most of all a great God. I mean really, God has been so good. No matter what happens, all I have or ever will have is more than I deserve or could ever ask for.


Like the Koran

Time for an update methinks no?

saturday spent the day ending the chapter of chapters in surgery, buying shoes and a shirt for the wedding, and then a night by the beach with ze guitars. It was rather fun, though the night passed really quickly from my point. Everyone left by about 12 :S looking for repeat performances though, +/- guitars :)

sunday oh sunday. I can't believe that Joe and Ang are married. I got to know them both pretty well as soon as I entered community, which was 4 years ago now, and now they're married. MARRIED. wow. The mass was great and the reception, everything I would expect XD Had an awesome time indeed :) God bless them with many many little magginis, I really can't wait for that *insert ANOTHER smiley here!!* XD

monday i'm car-less again, and this time I don't know for how long. It's being kept at the service centre until the boffins either figure out what's wrong with it or give up. I managed to avoid catching a bus yesterday (thanks Gruber), something which I don't think I'm going to manage today... ajma, 101 as usual then insomma.

I'm having trouble keeping up with all the blogs, I logged on yesterday and almost the entire bloglist had updated. Spending most of my time outside with limited computer access so forgive me if I'm not up to date with all of you :P

I wanted to write a bit of an introspective piece about my recent attitude... though i'm not entirely in the mood so I doubt this'll come out very well imma insomma. Recently I've felt like I've been talking about myself a lot... blog post comments, comments in general, real life conversations... just been analysing my behaviour lately and seeing the number of times I reference "I" and "me", and I'm rather perturbed. It's natural for people to talk about themselves, especially around those they're closest to. You hardly even notice it then, and it's normally reciprocal. That said, I don't particularly like to talk about myself a lot unless prompted to. It makes me feel self-centered, which I really hope is not the case, cause I don't want to be that type of person... though i've given it some thought and I think what it really relates to is God. Recently I've been preoccupied with all the things happening around me that I've neglected my prayer time, my relationship with the creator. And, ever so slowly, I think I'm starting to put Him back into that little box I had let Him out of four years ago. As there's less of God in my life, everything becomes about me, what I want and think and am. I know where that road leads, and it's barren. A life worth living is never lived for oneself. It's time the box got thrown out.


1:24 am

I've been reading about the general complications of surgery since 8:30... well, factor in facebook, twitter (i did tweet a lot), and my research on the original 60's star trek, the fifth element, final fantasy: the spirits within and some other one from 98' about robin williams dying and going to heaven but leaving it to go look for his wife in hell that i can't remember the name of... don't know how i remembered about that one, i was really little when i saw it.... google 'robin williams heaven' if you're curious (it's how i found it).

It's been really quiet all night, mostly cause i decided to not put on my itunes. Really quiet. Hekk.

William Shatner in the 60's! The dude was THIN!! well, ish. For shatner it's thin. He doesn't look all that different from Pine to be honest, the hair's the major thing. And well, the sixtiesness... The new generation stuff looks shite though.

I've been beaten, I'll do the summary tomorrow morning. I don't do this late night crap.



I sat down to do my quiet time this evening and this song just came out. I'm not sure why I wrote it and it definately has parallel meanings, one of which is a requiem. It's called Falling...

As the last breath is drawn
Shadows flee at Your call
Time is here, here and now
And Your voice is sweeter still

Draw me closer now
I'm falling deeper now

Your grace has carried me so far
These feet have walked, burned and scarred
Awake, O my soul
It's time to follow

Let the waters flow
Wash me in Your love

Let the waters flow
Wash me in Your love
Draw me closer now
I'm falling deeper now
I'm falling


Cheesy Crust Pony

I need to learn to stop putting dvd's in my cd drive...

Just got back home from Sunday lunch at the Pitch with the family and need to get down to some work soon. I'm in a really good/hyper mood, though it's subsiding now which has enabled me to actually write this... random events of the weekend, in reverse order:

> Lanf, you kill me. Videos of self studying, grandmasters and napolean, the absence of sweat glands and nye house parties. I could never love you more XD

> I heard mass at the pitch this morning and Fr Mike was celebrating it! And, just because that's the embarassing type of person he is, he gave me a shout out during the homily. Awesome.

> Last night. Oh man. Simon and Lanf basically summed up everything I could want to say about the night. Ivan, I could adopt you. More as a pet than a child though :P

> The praise session at y4j was great, I've long felt the need to strip away the accessories too. Funnily enough I always find that I'm most touched in praise and worship when there's just a few people and we can really focus on God. In fact I think personally nothing really compares to the praise i have with God alone at home. Maybe it's cause i know i don't have to focus on anything else and can just rest in Him... but really I suspect it's not of our making but just a question of how open we are and about when He chooses to move something within us... this usually involves me crying a lot... without the involvement of ice age, can you believe it? (if you didn't get this last bit, don't worry, you're normal... or well... i won't get into the arguement of what is normal...).

> Community on friday was the usual shindig, though I got into the worship more than I usually do... I have to lead next week *gulp*... we went to burger king afterwards, and, i will note, i saw the guy reach into a microwave, pull out a burger, and put it onto my tray. I say no more. Please can we not go to these places anymore? Please.

I have to take my car in for a service tomorrow morning. Poor Naomi's got something wrong with her exhaust and she's basically going into lapses of lifelessness despite me flooring it. Off to spend the day at Uni after that, finding I study more there than at home, and at least I get to be outside. Much much love.

Also, um, last note. This summer i'm going to have to make a big decision about what I'm going to do with my life. Details will follow eventually, but not for now. Prayers are very much appreciated :)

Big men with big drills outside my bedroom window at 7am. Good morning.

Today was kind of uneventful. I crawled out of bed and after doing the everyday things at home set off to university to spend some hours in the library. After spending a good two hours trying to learn some surgery I headed off to meet Dan and have a snack at Hugo's. He informed me that apparantly it's going to rain on saturday (it's his birthday on saturday, everyone remember to tell him he's not really getting that old). Anyways, I then headed off to DMM to carry on with ze studies (which wasn't as successful as the first round) in the company of Veronica, Malcolm, Jes, Mina, Daniela etc etc etc. Also the archbishop popped up, that was nice. XD

After that Simon came down and we went round to Lanf's Siggiewi house to have some time of intercession for the current and future university students. It was strange cause it's the first time that we (the marana tha group and the y4j group) have actively done something together, be it as small as it was. That said it was pretty great, I can't wait for doors to open and hands to move :)

Highlights of the week:

> I love agenda booksales. I got a total of six books over the week, including Einstein's theory of relativity (did I mention this in the last blog? I can't remember... *shrug*) and part of La Divina Commedia (I thought i had got all of it but upon further inspection it was only the bit on purgatory). I doubt I'll actually ever read those two in particular, but I think they're just things that one should own. You know, in general. I really, really, really want a bookcase.

> I joined twitter this week *moment of shame*. I always join social networking sites when I end up being bored and having someone near me to tell me to do it. With facebook it was my dad. With twitter it was Simon. Also note that twitter is refusing to work tonight and this is upsetting me. *more shame* But now I know what Tony Hawk is up to XD

> Thanks to Krissie for sending me the entire John Mayer album, and thanks to Achie for sending it to her. I tried listening to it on my iPods (i figured out why all my songs got removed the other day, it's what happens when you're synching your 'recently added' songs) while studying. It kind of worked out.

First exam next week... oh boy...


A night at the residence of Lady Loz

So so so so sooooo!!

Yesterday I went out for mother's day lunch with my mom and my grandparents, and returned home to get down to some much needed studying... which turned into repeated bouts of falling asleep in my reading chair... and evolved into going round to pick up simon to go to Laura's house for a dvd and some laughs. I will say this, I had a really, really good time. XD

Laura's apartment looks pretty much like any other single bedroom uni student-esque apartment I've seen, yet further probing revealed little bits of lay loz's personality which I found to be rather awesome and which I shall now share with you for you should appreciate the awesomeness of laura.

First off, the computer. A G4 macbook pro. Need I say more? Not just that but the top screen bit is customized with what I can only describe as parquee flooring for laptops. XD

Item number two: her mousepad is the rosetta stone. It didn't impress me when Simon pointed it out but then I actually saw it and well, it's the fracking rosetta stone!! Apparantly loz is somewhat of an egyptology enthusiast. Culture: check.

Item number three: the dvd collection. Bear in mind this is a single mid twenties girl we're talking about, so there are certain things you expect, such as 27 dresses, 27 dresses 2, mamma mia and several other musicals. What I didn't expect was all the Indiana Jones dvds, the original three Star Wars movies (episodes four through six), the Matrix trilogy and the Fifth Element. The Fifth Element!! I say no more.

The smithsonian choir was a good laugh, along with who knows how many things we got out of watching that. We really should make a proper spoof of the thing. I then subjected laura to brotherhood 2.0 and all things nerdfighteria. It is now only a matter of time XD

Having a bit of a John Mayer fest tonight. Man, it's just one of those times when I don't want to ask God for anything, but just thank Him for all that He's given.


A crossing

Tell me where to go and I'll go.
Tell me what to do and give me the grace, and I'll do it.
Tell me what you want me to say, and I'll speak.
Show me where I should move and that's where I'll go.
That's where I want to be.

I wonder what you're thinking, if your thoughts are like mine.
I hear the words you're speaking, but they don't match the look in your eyes.
They're not the words I want to hear.
But neither are mine.
Tell me what you want me to speak, and I'll speak.
Tell me what's there in front of you, and I'll echo it back.
It's not the beginning, or the end, it's just a page in a book and a note in a symphony.
But if you want it to be there, it will be.

Where do you want me to go?
Where do you want me to be?
Is it where I'm going?
If it isn't, would you guide me?
If it is, would you tell me?
I think it is.

Chaos and Relativity

Updates 3 days in a row... wonders never cease...

Made a few changes to the layout, hope everyone likes. I do, even though it's a tad busy. I kind of like the business actually XD

This isn't a real blog. Just want to point out 2 things:

1) Re the vlog. I know guys, I'm sorry, I just really felt like. I don't know if there'll be more of them, if there are I'm not gonna post them up here. You'll have to check out the youtube channel XD

2) I came across this today. I am utterly butterly in love:


I know, I know...

I know that I blogged yesterday and blogging everyday is not something that I (or most people) do but I had a couple of things that I wanted to share and I found myself with the time to share them so the sharing has begun. It prompted me to this:

I've also discovered John's blog today. The obsession I'm developing to the following of John Green and the subsequent imitation is something that I have indeed noticed and is probably a cause for concern. This could get several balls rolling. To several degrees. I'm on your screenz, spamming your brainz.



> I just filled in a couple of facebook quizzes, just cause you know, they're there, one of which told me I'm Cyrus the Great. I didn't know who Cyrus is, so I wiki'd him: "the founder of the Persian Empire under the Achaemenid dynasty, which was an empire without precedent— a world-empire of major historical importance". Of course I'm not actually Cyrus the great, but eastern history is so cool XD

> Was contemplating life in a global manner the other night and realised that pretty much no matter what happens (or well, as far as i can foresee with the limited amount of sight that I have) the life I'm leading (and safe to say most of my friends, meaning you guys, are leading) is really awesome and nothing can really change that. I mean sure, things come and go that stress us out or put us down occassionally, but they come and they go. Overall everything is really so great and we're all so very blessed. Just making the observation really...

> Was listening to this song today while taking a break from trying to study:

Made me happy that summer's on it's way again, but more so than that, it reminded me of the times I've been through with people I've known and basically everything that's helped make me who I am over the years. I don't know why it did this, considering I only heard the song for the first time about a year ago... nonetheless I've now got this urge to go back to my roots and rediscover those things that are personal to me and my experience of life. I don't really know what brought this on, maybe a sense of feeling lost in myself lately... summat like that... more reflections and all things pensive to follow...maybe.