Ask and you shall receive

Ok so Sarah wants blog, a blog she gets.

Now, about this whole anonymous commentary going on, I'm not really bothered with it anymore as you might have guessed. It might have been fun to actually try and find out who it is, up until it just got too complicated and well sad really. And Sarah's right, if you're going to do it, at least make it interesting. Nuff said, comment if you like, anything I don't approve of I'll delete (how's that for communism for ya? cencorship of the people yar!).

I've had one of THOSE days today. The type where you sit down and have all the intentions in the world to do a good load of work.......and end up literally wasting your time looking at pointless things on the internet and staring at the wall daydreaming. I've been having a lot of these days recently and it's becoming disconcerning..... I honestly tried to do some biochemistry today, but, as is with most of our physiology, it's loaded with so much detail that I always end up finishing a chapter and not knowing what the heck the author's on about. That and the fact that I don't really know what's important to learn and what isn't since it all looks like a collection of utterly useless facts. So, for today at least I'm going back to anatomy, at least I'll actually learn something..... I'm sorry for the med rant, I'll probably take most of what I've said back sooner or later, but so speaks my mood. Ha!

After listening to the same 5 albums over and over and over and over again for the past couple of months, I went on a desperate search to find some new good christian music on the net (there's a limited number of times you can listen to Hillsong United without getting buggged of it). And music I found. However it was in the form of Jonah 33, Disciple and Decypher Down. Now, if you look any of these bands up on the net, you'll find they all have one thing in common. They're very metal-loaded angsty christians. Coming from a devoted metal background myself (Limp Bizkit, Korn, Slipknot.... the works..... never Iron Maiden though, never really understood THEM) I should be thrilled about this... but no. I just.... don't know how supposedly devoted christians can play this kind of music, nor how they'd want to listen to it. Outside of religious backgrounds it makes perfect sense to want to play and listen to it. But when I met God was when I stopped needing to funnel any aggression or need to try and communicate with a world that I felt was unfair or unjust. Some might argue that they do so to reach out to people in a way that they understand, but I've come to learn that that's not what God is, and no matter how hard you try, you can't project Him in that way. And it's not just a matter of principle, I can't listen to this kind of music anymore, Christian-inspired or not, becuase I physically feel uncomfortable. It's part of how God changes you. This doesn't mean I'm happy with the dreary 50's church songs they play everywhere (please, gimme a break). Writing music for and about God is something to be passionate about, as is the way your life reflects that passion. After this afternoon's search I was just left with a big desire to just start writing my own stuff and to really get something solid together with the guys. I don't know, if I daydream about dropping out and studying art and writing anymore I might wake up and find I've actually done it....

Out.